Kolya

Here, Alisa said as she handed Nikolai a cup of hot chocolate.

Nikolai glanced at the ceramic cup held out in front of him, declining it he said, Give it to the kids.

Bringing his attention back towards the kids playing in the snow, Tell them to start heading back in. Nikolai slowly made his way back to the front steps of the orphanage with his wheelchair as Alisa collected the kids.

I can help, Alisa said, noticing that Nikolai had no way of going up the orphanage steps.

Hand me my cane, Nikolai said at the same time.

Right, of course, Alisa said, reaching into the pouch on the back of Nikolai’s wheelchair for his cane.

I don’t know why the director still won’t install a ramp, Alisa absentmindedly said aloud while folding Nikolai’s wheelchair up to bring in.

Isn’t it cause the director hates Nikolai? a voice said, appearing out of nowhere and sticking to Nikolai.

Ilya! What are you saying? Alisa replied, shocked at the kids' bluntness.

Don’t say that with everyone present, Nikolai reprimanded him, giving Ilya a gentle knock on the head.

It’s true though, Ilya shrugged as he drank the hot chocolate. Recently the director hardly gives you any missions because of how long it takes you to recover.

I asked the director to give me fewer missions, cause I don’t like handling them, Nikolai explained, as they walked into the orphanage.

Nikolai! The director wants to see you in his office, shouted one of the kids, standing at the top of the stairs. Bracing himself for what the director wanted to talk about, Nikolai made his way down to his office.

Kolya! You’ve been feeling alright? the director asked and smiled, while getting up from his seat and walking towards him, After all this time, your knees are still bothering you? he added after noticing that Nikolai was using his cane.

I’ve been alright,

How about your eyes? Any irritation? the director rambled while checking Nikolai’s eyes.

As usual, they haven’t caused any irritation in the past 20 years sir.

Good, I paid a lot of money for those. A shame your knees turned out that way.

Nowadays it was standardized to buy spare parts of the human body. Those with disabilities were able to have that fixed with a simple transplant with the biomechatronic counterpart. Due to the price and demand in such procedures, patients would often have to wait years. Some may opt for a quicker yet more expensive option; having it done illegally. It was even possible to replace perfectly healthy body parts before the deterioration, but not without a risk.

It was a gamble, you know? With you being born blind and the first child I took under my wing, I was worried it’d fail. I was worried I’d end up putting you through more pain, the director said.

I believe you’ve called me for a reason, Nikolai interrupted, tired of the director constantly bringing up the past.

Yes, thank you for reminding me. I hope your skills haven’t been forgotten with you always sitting in that wheelchair. Here, I need it done the day after tomorrow, the director says, handing a file to Nikolai, I know you don’t take any requests during this season but they’ve asked us to prioritize this commission and they’ve paid top dollar to get this done.

Like always the file contained a name, picture and their personal schedule for the next five days. Volkov Orphanage, founded and named by the director, a safe environment where unwanted children lived together. For those who know, Volkov Orphanage was the place to go when you wanted someone gone. Children who have spent 10 years unadopted were expected to pay back the orphanage as a way of thanks for raising them.

Perfect you’re back! Lemme tell you what the other kids and me were thinking! Ilya said, eyes brightening the moment he spotted Nikolai in the halls. Standing on the tips of his toes, he whispered, We were thinking that if you were tired of doing the director’s orders, you should just kill him.

Ilya took a moment to allow Nikolai to process what he just said, seeing how he stayed silent, Ilya continued rambling, Don’t act like you like him. we all know that you rarely take on jobs like these, with how much it drains you.

It’s complicated, Ilay you wouldn’t understand, Nikolai said, defending himself.

It’s not that complicated. We all like you better than him, plus you can easily replace him, Ilya explained like it was something as easy as counting to three.

Why would you say that, Ilya?

What do you mean? Everytime the director talks to you, you always end up depressed.

Alright then, it was just a suggestion, Ilya said, raising his hands in defense as he continued down the hall.

When nikolai arrived at the top of the building he began to set up his equipment.

The next day, Nikolai found himself lying on the roof of a tall building, with a loaded rifle on his shoulder. Nikolai felt uncomfortable with the scope so he zoomed in with his own biomechanical eyes given to him by the director when he was eight years old. As usual, it began with an adrenaline rush, his heart pounding in his chest, his hands clammy yet his eyes have never left the target. His pointer finger on the trigger, in an attempt to calm himself he breathed in, held it and breathed out. The moment he felt himself pressing down on the trigger, he heard Ilya’s voice in the distance, You should just kill him.

Nikolai began to feel nauseous, his chest getting tighter with each breath, making it harder to breathe, and began to dry heave. Trying to control himself he forces himself to count three things he can see; his rifle, the dead body and…his eyes searched desperately for a third item, his bag. Then he focused on three things he could hear; the cars on the road below him, his heartbeat and Ilya’s voice in his head, You should just kill him. Three different body parts; his metal knee joints causing him discomfort, his fingers and his biomechanical eyes. Once he calmed down he packed up his belongings and headed back to the director. As he made his way back, Ilya’s words kept echoing in his head.

Kolya! You’re back my dear, how efficient. I know I’ve chosen you for a reason, five years of saving every penny for your eyes was worth it! The director praised, giving Nikolai a gentle smile and a pat on his back, Since you’re back in action, here are some more missions that need to be finished. The director handed Nikolai a thick pile of folders.

I don’t want to always hear that you need time to recovery,

As the director spoke, Nikolai could feel himself getting overstimulated, hyper aware of the gun he kept in his back pocket. The walls began to close in, he fiddled with his fingers, the director’s voice was getting louder and louder with each word. Nikolai’s eyes focused on the flickering lights that the director refused to fix, his voice echoing in his head.

Kolya? Are you alright? Is it one of those episodes again? You can’t let that keep affecting your performance, the director tutted, noticing Nikolai’s discomfort, he reprimanded Pull yourself together and get the work done.

Unable to focus on what the director was saying, he hears Ilya’s voice like a broken record playing in his head non stop You should just kill him. You should just kill him. Kill him.

I should just kill him

Nikolai hears a loud bang his ears ringing in protest, but now the grating voice is gone.

I killed him.